STUDENT DRIVER

I'VE MOVED TO MULTIPLY. THANKS FOR DROPPING BY.

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 15:24:00 +0000

OF SIMPLE JOYS AND RED CUPS

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 12:30:00 +0000

I rarely write about earthly pleasures but this one deserves an exception. I learned today that the Starbucks Red Cups will be back on November 4. Yay! Among the few shallow reasons why I love the Christmas season, this one tops my list. You know where I'll be on November 4.

THOU SHALL NOT ASSUME

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 03:58:00 +0000

Last night, I was reminded of this teaching which, as we jokingly say in Lingkod, is the 11th commandment: Thou shall not assume.

In operational terms, it means that when someone texts you every single day with sweet messages, drives you home, picks you up from work, takes care of you when you're sick, sends you gifts, and buys your favorite ice cream the day after you tell him that you're craving for one, you still should not assume that he likes you until and unless he categorically declares his intention. This principle applies to both men and women, the rationale being that in community, we live in committed Christian relationships.

I've been applying this teaching almost automatically to every relationship I have with the opposite sex. It has served me in good stead, as it has helped me guard my heart and steer clear from possible complications in my dealings with men.

BUT as in all teachings, I have my fair share of unguarded moments when I myself contravene the very principles that I advocate.

Case in point: NOW.

So last night was a reality check. The commandment hasn't been amended, after all. I am still proscribed from assuming. At kahit mag-black and white man ang mundo pag inapply ko to, yun pa rin ang totoo.

The lawyer in me is coming up with a thousand ways to go around this teaching without necessarily contravening it. The Christian in me, however, is convinced that the teaching makes perfect sense, and following it is a way of honoring God and the person who may be causing all of my assumptions. And because I am a Christian first and a lawyer second, I will abide. For, when it comes to major matters, especially of the heart, I base my decisions on Godly wisdom. No exceptions, no provisos, whatsoever.

I have to say, though, that in the meantime, the girl in me is saying: "This used to be so easy."

CHRISTMAS CAME EARLY

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 12:57:00 +0000

Just when I thought it was over, just when I was ready to call it quits and permanently bid this person goodbye, something happened that made me change my mind.

So things are now back to how they're supposed to be and I'm extremely happy. I'm glad I made the first move. I'm glad I didn't let my pride take over. I'm glad I listened to well-meaning friends who gave me sound and godly advice. I'm glad to have this person back in my life. And more than anything, I'm glad that in the end, love prevailed.

Something tells me this is just the first of the many wishes that will be granted on my Christmas list.

PLAYING GOD

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 08:49:00 +0000

Pardon the negative connotation of my title, but sometimes it feels that way whenever I write a decision as part of my work as a court attorney.

My law school batchmate and friend Dred who used to work as a court attorney and who's now in Boston for her LLM wrote on her Facebook a few days ago that she misses typing the "omnipotent WHEREFORE." For those who aren't familiar with court decisions, 'wherefore' is what we write before the dispositive portion of our decision. It's the word that precedes our final ruling and which carries with it a sense of finality and authority, such that everytime you reach that part of the decision when you have to type it, you somehow begin to feel that you have dispensed justice in your own little way.

That's why I couldn't help but agree with Dred's use of the word omnipotent. Because when you come to think of it, in a certain sense, omnipotent is what you become the moment you decree how the parties in one case should conduct themselves after the decision you wrote is promulgated. And sometimes, I feel uncomfortable just thinking about this. Who are we, after all, to decide whether a person is really psychologically incapacitated to comply with his or her essential marital obligations? Who are we to decree whether this kid should be adopted by these particular individuals, who, just by our appreciation of the evidence at hand, seem qualified to have parental authority over the potential adoptee? Who are we to say that a marriage has to end, or that a mother should be deprived of custody over her children, or that a person is not capable of handling his own affairs anymore?

Of course, there are standards and legal precepts to follow and to aid us in arriving at a just decision. And in the interest of maintaining order, the society has to live with the fact that when it comes to disputes involving even the most personal matters, an impartial stranger has to step in and decide what is right for everyone.

But while our knowledge of the law is probably enough for us to determine what is just and equitable, it still becomes overwhelming sometimes just to think think that our appreciation of what actually transpired, whether it is right or wrong, ultimately becomes the reality for the parties involved.

Today, I submitted a decision that took more than three weeks for me to write. Because of the implications of its outcome, I felt, for the first time, the magnitude of what I actually do in my work. It's not that I don't trust my judgment. But the thought that henceforth, the parties would have to live with my conclusion, totally blows my mind away.

Of course, as in all decisions I write, my boss will have the final say. Of course, the parties can appeal. Of course, my conclusion can be overruled. But until these things happen, my determination of what's true and what's just stays. To my mind, this is as close as anyone can get to playing god. And suddenly, I'm not so sure anymore how to feel about it.

WEEKEND BLESSING

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 11:36:00 +0000

When you can express yourself to someone and trust that you will be understood and not be judged for it, consider yourself blessed.

I did just that last night and I didn't regret it.

And so now, I feel blessed. And loved.

This should see me through the long week ahead.

ACCORDING TO THE QUIZ....

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:01:00 +0000

I Act Like I am 26 Years Old

I am a twenty-something at heart. I feel like an adult, and I'm optimistic about life.
I feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

I'm still figuring out my place in the world and how I want my life to shape up.
The world is full of possibilities, and I can't wait to explore many of them.

What Age Do You Act?

A BETTER WAY TO SPEND MY SUNDAY

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 08:58:00 +0000

First, a confession: Every time I have to attend a Sectoral Assembly on a Sunday, I have to literally drag myself out of bed and stop myself from complaining why I have to wake up so early on the only day of the week I can afford to sleep in.

This morning was no exception. In fact, I had to apologize to my Women's Group for my grumpiness on our way to the Ligaya Center.

But almost every time, the moment the worship begins and the word of God is proclaimed, I would feel thankful for being there. Today, again, was no exception.

God's message for me today is this: DARKNESS IS NEVER A PERMANENT CONDITION FOR MY PEOPLE. It may be passing, fleeting, intermittent even, but it is never meant to be a permanent condition for my people.

These words jolted me and instantly assured me that whatever darkness I'm experiencing right now shall soon come to an end. I felt God telling me that my present predicament is not His last word on the matter and that He is still a God whose words can be relied on despite what my circumstances may indicate at the moment.

And then through the sharings, I witnessed how God has been moving in this community through His people whose commitment to each other is beyond compare.

So I went home today brimming with hope and sufficiently reminded of why I'm in now in Ligaya and why, despite my reservations at the start, there is a good reason why I keep coming back. God is in this community. Alive, present and personal. I couldn't ask for anything more.

LOOKING FORWARD

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 07:56:00 +0000

I would've wanted the title of this post to be "Moving Forward" (hehe) because of its connotation in my community but this post is obviously not about that.

With the year almost over, these are the things I am looking forward to in the remaining three months:

1. Sr. Perry's final vows in Cebu which I will attend together with Juanda and Darleth.
2. Reunion with my JGlaw barkada sometime this month.
3. My friend's piano recital, also sometime this month.
4. Our second Pandan Island trip with QC people ( matutuloy 'to, promise, kahit sino ang pwede)
5. My personal retreat, hopefully by December. ( I badly need one!)
6. Reunion with UP Law 2000C (happening this November, according to Mina)
7. Trip with Kat and Agnes somewhere (we couldn't agree yet where)
8. Weekend with the BWMs (assuming we find a common time)
9. Christmas bonus (must be on everyone's list)
10. The return of Starbucks' Peppermint Mocha Frap (my simple joy every Christmas season)
11. Advent, Simbang gabi (I think I'll be able complete it this time) and of course, Christmas.
12. Reunion with my Pol Sci block (which I will organize)
13. Season two of Samantha Who ( I am such a fan!)

And two other major significant events that I'm still working on and can't mention yet here. ;)

It's been a good year---one marked with very high ups and not-so-low downs. Though a lot of things didn't go my way, a lot of them still did. I can't complain.

WHAT'S THE MORE LOVING THING TO DO?

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sat, 04 Oct 2008 11:35:00 +0000

I'm in the middle of a major struggle right now concerning this person I happen to value and really love. Tonight, as I reflect on what to do with this situation, I ask myself: What, really, is the more loving thing to do?

And the answer is: I don't know anymore.

I know I have to come to terms with the messy parts of my life. I have to live with all my regrets, especially the ones brought about by the mistakes I willingly committed. I have to accept life's complications and trust that my worth as a person should not be affected by all these imperfections.

But how do I do that? How do I reconcile my disposition with what is ideal? What is God's mind on this?

Again, I don't know. I'm often told that loving is still the best option and I've always believed that. In this case, however, I'm not so sure anymore.

THE FATAL DREADED MEMO

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 12:15:00 +0000

I love my job. I really do. The hours are reasonable (in fact, that is an understatement), the people are warm, the work itself is challenging enough especially when a controversial case gets assigned to you every now and then, the pay may not be that impressive but it's just enough, in fact, more than enough if you're single and simple (ahem ahem). And...what stress level? As we often say, hindi uso yun sa CA.

But there is one tiny thing about my job that I absolutely hate: those horrible unflattering uniforms. On normal days, we could easily get away with not wearing them. But as I've been told, in view of the recent controversies that the CA was confronted with, someone hatched the brilliant idea of issuing a memo mandating all court employees to wear their uniforms again. Don't ask me exactly how this ties up with the Court's moral recovery program. I was told that it was, so I won't dare question it.

So today I went to work wearing my green (yes, green!) uniform. And tomorrow, I'll go to work wearing the purple (yes, purple!!!) one. I rarely invoke the fact that I'm a lawyer (except when I have to justify why my IBP ID should be recognized as an official ID which, apparently, very few banks know) but now, I'm just so tempted to do so. Except that there's no point in arguing with the security guards who are just doing their job. And I know that no matter what happens, regardless of how plausible my arguments are, they still wouldn't exempt me from the coverage of that fatal dreaded memo.
Well, at least work still ends at 4:30. No one can have it all.

A SEPTEMBER I DISTINCTLY REMEMBER

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 07:58:00 +0000

I thought I could resist blogging about something that's so eight years ago, but I couldn't. Not when Father Rudy instructed me yesterday to think of the things I should be thankful for, instead of sulking over things I'm obviously not meant to have.

I'm talking about the Bar Exams. For, what other September could be more meaningful for a "pretend lawyer" ( if I may borrow Jo's term) such as myself than that September some years ago when the only thing that mattered was taking and eventually passing the Bar?

The details of that September are forever etched in my mind. For four gruelling Sundays, I had to wake up real early, pray, psyche myself that I was ready, dress up, force myself to eat lest I faint during the exam, check my stuff, walk to La Salle (the hotel where we stayed was 5 minutes away from Gokongwei Bldg), attempt to ignore the cheering crowd (I swear, BarOps could be distracting), find my room and finally take the exam while silently praying at the same time (yes, it can be done if you're that desperate).

The most memorable part for me was when the guy sitting next to me stood up in the middle of Political Law (the 1st exam on the first day) tore his test paper, surrendered it to the watcher and walked out of the room sobbing. Imagine our shock when that happened. The Bar, indeed, is not for the faint-hearted.

When I handed my exam booklet in Ethics (the last exam on the last Sunday), I remember begging God to make me pass, not because I didn't want to do it again, but because I didn't want to subject my family to the same stress and tension all over again. To this day, whenever I doubt my family's love and support for me, I look back to those times and become convinced that I am truly loved.

Today is the last day of the Bar Exams. As I write this, the examinees must be having their Beer-Ops already. I didn't go to any of the post-bar parties during my time. After the last exam, I went straight home and then my mom and I went to the church to hear mass and to thank God for sustaining me. As far as I can recall, that must have been the longest time I ever spent at the blessed sacrament.

When Father Rudy reminded me yesterday to be thankful for all the things that God has blessed me with, especially those which I feel I don't deserve, I knew that passing the Bar should be on top of my list. I know it's been a while since God answered my prayer. But if you've experienced taking the Bar at least once in your life, you'll understand why eight years later, I'm just as thankful.

To the 2008 Bar Examinees, especially those from Lingkod and CLASE, congratulations! You don't have to wait for the results to know that you are blessed. I will keep you in my prayers.

a.k.a. Alessandra

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 09:36:00 +0000

My Facebook friends have been asking me why I'm using the name Alessandra for my Facebook account. The simple answer to that question is that Facebook, for reasons I cannot quite fathom, does not want to accept the name Gay and thus, I was compelled to use my third name even though very few people know about it.

I don't know why I never use Alessandra. Perhaps because it is too long and in grade school, long names spell disaster because one, your friends will never remember them, and two, your teacher would already be asking question number three in your quiz and there you are, still writing the last letter of your name on your pad paper. Believe me. I have three names so I know how it is.

But I think the reason why I don't use Alessandra is that I coudn't identify with it. It's just so not me. And I won't elaborate because if you know me, I mean really really know me, you should know what I mean.

So my friends call me Gay, my closest friends call me Gigay and my family calls me Gaying. Alessandra, on the other hand, is what my mom calls me when she's mad and I need to be reminded of my proper place (as in Alessandra, sumusobra ka na!). And that explains why I will never be at home with it. And why I will never be a fan of Facebook.

THE THINGS YOU REALIZE WHEN YOU'RE SICK

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 00:50:00 +0000

Yes, Darleth, it IS a hopeful song. ;)

Song lyrics | Realize lyrics

NOTE TO SELF: REST

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 06:21:00 +0000

I woke up today with colds and a really bad headache. I'm sick AGAIN. I blame it on the fact that I haven't been taking care of myself lately. The past week, I went home late every night, on account of which, I seem to have developed a bad case of insomnia. So I've been sleeping late (if at all) and waking up early. And then last Friday and yesterday, I was out until 3:00 am even though I knew I had to be up really early the following day.

I know that my body couldn't keep up anymore with the schedule I used to keep five years ago. I know I can't afford anymore to go sleepless for two consecutive nights the way I did when I was in law school. I know I shouldn't be out almost every night of the week especially when I can foresee that my weekend would be full. But still, I do it. And for reasons I don't understand.

So now, I'm paying for it. I have to get well in time for the RLTC in Baguio on Wednesday. Which means I have to go to work tomorrow to finish the case I'm working on before Wednesday. But based on my current state ( I think it's the start of a bad flu), it looks like the only things I'd be doing for the next several days are sleep, rest and contemplate on how I badly need a major lifestyle change. I can almost hear my mom saying, "I told you so."

MY BROTHER'S KEEPER

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 23:36:00 +0000

It all started when I attended a wedding in Tagaytay last February and Jim Orbe was kind enough to drive my car all the way back to Manila. Since Mirac was sleeping at the back seat, Jim and I had the chance to talk about our families, specifically, our blood brothers. I told him I've always wanted to invite my brother RJ to Lingkod but he had so many things going on in his life that he never really had the time to consider my invitation. Jim shared that he had the same experience with his brother and he told me how, with the help of other brothers in community, he was able to finally invite him to Lingkod Greenhills. "I was only asking God for the conversion of my brother," he said, "pero sobra sobra ang response ng Panginoon" (Jim's brother eventually entered the seminary). When I heard that, I was really struck and I felt a surge of hope that this could happen to RJ as well. (Perhaps not enter the seminary [hehe] but be an active member of Lingkod). So I started REALLY praying about it. I also started asking the brothers and sisters from Lingkod to start praying for his evangelization.
Well I'm happy to share that last night, my brother RJ has completed his CLP in Lingkod QC and that he has been telling me since day one that he is now beginning to see the difference that God is making in his life. When Jim gave a talk during the CLP and I told him that my brother was among the participants, he exclaimed "wow, answered prayer!" And it was, indeed.
From this experience, I learned that if we really want to bring a person closer to God, all we have to do is to sincerely desire it, create opportunities for it and trust that God will do the rest. Frankly, I was really doubtful at the start if this could be possible. But thanks be to God, it did happen. I also thank the Lingkod brothers and sisters---special mention goes to Tim, (RJ's DGL), Mark, Francis, Marlon, Jayson (who never failed to make RJ feel welcome all the time), Ted, Bobby and Jim (whose talks made quite an impact on RJ), Tony of Lingkod Manila (his talk in Cavite which RJ heard because he was the one who drove us there was also a major turning point for him) and Anthony of Lingkod Greenhills (who was the one who patiently and consistently texted RJ to attend the CLP ever since RJ attended the ULT a year ago).
There is really no greater joy than the one I felt when I saw my brother commit his life to God and welcome Him in his life. Last night, I couldn't help but think that of all the things I did in my walk with the Lord, this one made Him smile the most. ;)

UP PEP SQUAD!

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 12:08:00 +0000

MATATAPANG! MATATALINO! WALANG TAKOT, KAHIT KANINO! GANYAN KAMING TAGA-UP!

WISDOM FROM A TV COMMERCIAL

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 10:04:00 +0000

I loved this commercial when it first came out years ago. But I love it even more now that I realized something from it: that it's easy to say goodbye when you know what you really want, and that goodbyes need not be melodramatic and lonely after, all.

OUR LIVES ACCORDING TO E-HEADS

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 12:15:00 +0000

In view of the fact that I wasn't able to watch THE E-heads concert, (yes, I'm still bitter about it!), my sister Hazel and my brother RJ attempted to compensate for it by singing our favorite E-heads songs one fine night, with RJ playing the guitar and Ate dictating the lyrics and me on vocals. (nax!) And then we asked ourselves: if you were to pick a line from an E-heads song which speaks about the story of your life, what would that be?

Ate said that for her, it has be this line from Shirley: After three days, nag-ring an telepono ni Shirley. Si binata, ngayo'y nagso-sorry, Ilang minuto at sila'y mag-on na uli! Ganyan ma-in love-love-love! Ganyan ma-in-love.

We teased RJ that these lines tell his story: Ilang beses na akong nagpapa-cute sayo. Di mo man lang napapansin ang bagong T-shirt ko! Sagutin mo lang ako aking sinta'y walang humpay na ligaya.

The brother of my friend resonates with the lyrics of Magasin (iba na ang yong ngiti! iba na ang yong tingin! nagbago nang lahat sayo!) because his high school girlfriend became a starlet several years after they broke up.

Ate and RJ said that mine is Overdrive because of my pathetic driving skills (or the lack thereof). I insisted, however, that my life, according to E-heads, is best described by these words: Pasensya na, kung ako ay umiiyak. Mababaw lang talaga ang luha ko. Di ko mapigil, and aking damdamin. Pwede bang umalis ka na, tumutunog na ang beeper mo. Wag mo na akong pilitin, ako ay walang lakas ng loob para tumanggi. Walang dapat ipagtaka, ako ay pinanganak na torpe dyan sa tabi-tabi.

And I'm not going to explain any further. ;)

HINDI KA ABOGADO KUNG WALA KA NITO

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 11:34:00 +0000

I dismissed a Petition today for improper verification.

Tsk.Tsk.

Hindi sana nangyari kung meron sya nito....

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STARING AT MY OWN WALL

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 07:26:00 +0000

I watched Randy Pausch's last lecture (through Maye's multiply) a week ago and something that he said really stayed with me. He said: The walls are there in front of us, not to block our way but to remind us how badly we want something.

It stirred me because what he said was something I partly agree and partly disagree with.

I totally agree that walls are there for a reason. As to what reason that may be, however, is one thing that calls for a lot of deliberation. My take is that some walls are there to challenge us, and thus, as Pausch puts it, to remind us how badly we need something. Sadly, however, some walls are there to serve the one purpose that walls are built for: to block our way. Not to challenge us, but to tell us loud and clear that what's behind it is off-limits.

The context in which I'm saying these things is the one giant, immovable wall that I've been staring at for quite some time now---one that I sometimes look at merely from afar. Should I climb over it? And if I do, would I regret it in the end? Would it be worth climbing? And, will I like what I'd find on the other side?

The value of the speaker's statement is that it gave me a framework with which to evaluate my predicament: Is this wall a reminder of how I want this thing badly or is it there to tell me precisely that this is a dead-end?

I don't know. All I know is that as walls go, this one is specifically hard to climb and should I decide to climb and bruise myself in the process, it shall leave its own special scar that might take forever to heal. And yet, part of me is hoping that this is just a temporary block that I need not even climb right now but that will soon collapse by itself because some mighty force will command it to, one fine day.

In the end, I haven't resolved anything just yet. So for now, I shall apply by analogy what one wise priest once said: LOVE TRUMPS ALL LAWS. Perhaps, this too, applies to walls.

THE ONE

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 07:08:00 +0000

I'm watching Boston Legal again. This show, for all its objectionable points of view, is nonetheless worth watching if only for its ability to drive home points that are close to home.

The episode I saw last night was the one where Denny Crane was telling Alan Shore that for him, Shirley Schmidt (his law firm partner and ex-girlfriend) was still "The One." "All these years and there your are, still believing in The One," Alan remarked. "Love is an ugly business, " Denny replied. "And yet, it's what we live for," said Alan.

The conversation took place at Denny Crane's office balcony where the show's episodes usually end. But it could have very well been me and my law school friend Kat (who, incidentally, has found the person she thinks is The One) conversing in our school dorm, with her as Denny and me as Alan.

You see, after all these years, I've stopped believing in The One. And I say this, not out of bitterness but out of the realization that this whole concept of finding the one or of being the one is so overrated.

Call me unromantic; pessimistic, even. But this is what I believe in: I believe in discernment and in listing down your essentials in a person and in determining which of those traits in your list are non-negotiable. I believe in considering a person, not because of how he makes you feel but how, in the scheme of things, you two can build a good christian family. I believe that love is a decision and that the feelings will follow once you are convinced that your choice is right. I believe that though all of this might sound too devoid of human emotions, it has worked for most people I know. And in an era where court dockets are clogged with annulment cases (I, for one, have decided quite a number) perhaps even more than collection cases, what people need is something that works, instead something that will simply make them feel good momentarily.

So Denny Crane could pine for Shirley all he wants but I'm concurring with Alan Shore. Come to think of it, Ally Mc Beal had the same philosophy as Denny with respect to the love of her life, Billy. Look at how that one turned out.

ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 09:45:00 +0000

I was at Powerbooks yesterday, holding the last copy of the book The Mermaid Chair, contemplating whether it was worth buying even if the cover was already torn and the pages were creased, when my friend arrived and told me she'd buy it for me. I asked why and she said, "Because Gay, you've never asked me for anything in our 18 years of friendship!" And it occurred to me how right she was. To think she's one of my closest friends.

Which made me think: perhaps I've been like this as well with God. Because come to think of it, when was the last time I asked Him for something really major? When was the last time I begged Him for something and trusted Him to listen? And despite that, I have just recently been a recipient of His favors.

So I've resolved to start asking Him again for big, life-altering blessings. He is, after all, a God who grants not only what we need but also what we want. I should remind myself of this truth more often.

THE CASE FOR PLATONIC FRIENDSHIP

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 06:29:00 +0000

ISSUE: Whether or not platonic friendship is possible

HELD: YES

RATIO: Because when two mature people are capable of being bigger than themselves, falling in love with each other does not always have to be part of the equation.

I'm writing this because I recently watched the movie Definitely Maybe which left me thinking about platonic friendships and how they are really supposed to end. While the film has its own merits, as it's a story about love and second chances and the hope of getting what you truly long for no matter how circuitous the road may be, I was disappointed with the way it tackled the concepts of friendship and love.

Not that I don't believe in friendships turning into love affairs. Cases in point: Monica and Chandler of Friends, Harry and Sally of When Harry Met Sally, Joey and Pacey of Dawson's Creek, Joe and Kathleen of You've Got Mail, and, sorry but this has to be on my list, Peachy and Joaqs of TGIS.

But you have to agree with me that there's so much beauty and promise in friends simply remaining as such. My Best Friend's Wedding, for instance, has the best ending as far as love stories go. It's realistic, honest, sad yet hopeful. It proves that friendship can be just friendship and that your friend's happy ending does not necessarily have to be yours. It shows what tragic things can happen when you stop guarding your heart and base your actions simply on how you feel. It explains why sometimes, the best way to love a friend is to forget yourself, step aside and let him know and decide what he really wants, once and for all.

I know all this because one of my best friends happens to be male. Although we haven't seen each other in a while (because he pursued a more lucrative career abroad), I know that he remains to be one of the few people who really gets me. And our friendship is really just pure friendship. No tension whatsoever. He walked with me through the most terrifying expriences of my life (which includes talking to a detainee inside a city jail for my first case as a law school intern), he was the first person who called me when I passed the bar, he accompanied me to my job interviews, drove me home whenever it was late and I couldn't find a cab, went with me on a pilgrimage and to other religious activities that my other friends did not want to go to; listened to my sob stories even when he found most of them pathetic and acted as my adviser on matters of the heart (although I never really followed any of his advice). In return, I made sure that his bills were paid on time when he studied abroad, befriended this girl she used to like, ran his last-minute errands, and pretended to be an urgent caller every time he needed an escape plan.

This is why I have issues when it comes to love stories where best friends end up with each other. I know from experience that that shouldn't always be the case. Our other friend Kat would attest to this, although she would also be the first to say that our friendship was an exception. But that's precisely what I'm saying: that there is an exception. And once you find it, you should know better than to fall into the "When Harry Met Sally" school of thought. Because not everyone can be Monica and Chandler. And for us who live in the real world, pure friendship minus the complications is definitely better.

IN OUR DEFENSE

noreply@blogger.com (studentdriver) — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 04:26:00 +0000

So much has been said and written about the most recent controversy involving the Court of Appeals. Just this morning, a lawyer-friend texted me about it to ask if the recent update she's been hearing in the legal circles is true. I replied that aside from what we read and hear in the news, I don't have any other inside information to impart.

But this much I know is true: there are a lot of good, honest, hard-working, noble justices and lawyers in the CA who simply want to do their job and dispense justice without fear or favor. Among the cases being decided by this office, perhaps only 2 out of 10 are controversial and even then, we quietly do our work, unmindful of what the parties or the public would say. Which is why I find it rather unfair for the media to brand the CA as an office riddled with corruption. It's unfair for them to paint a picture of justices seeking out bribes when the truth of the matter is that no case for bribery has been proven, let alone, tried by the proper forum. It's unfair for them to generalize and say that cases can be bought here without citing any factual basis for such generalization. It's unfair for them to suggest that every single person in the government will easily give in to every offer of bribery that comes his way.

When I started working for the government, I took a pay cut and consequently had to drastically change my lifestyle. It was difficult but I still do not regret this decision even to this day. Because here, finally, is a job i can be proud of. Here, finally is a job where I get to be a christian lawyer and be commended for it. Here, finally, is a job where I can make a contribution to the society, never mind if I do it sans the power suit and the fancy dinner meetings and the high-profile clients and the promise of a comfortable future.

So the last thing I can tolerate is the insinuation that the institution I'm working for is nothing but a TRO mill. Because even assuming without conceding that there may be a few rotten eggs in this office, the vast majority of those who work for the CA are really honest and dedicated, albeit underpaid public servants. And this goes true, even for the justices whose names have been unfortunately dragged to various controversies in the past. I know because I see them at work everyday. I know because in my three years in this office, nobody has ever dared to dictate or impose upon me how a particular case should be decided.

It is indeed unfortunate that while we in Court try our best to decide cases based solely on the merits and on the rules, what We are up against is trial by publicity where no rules apply, and where judgment comes even before due process is observed. But for whatever it's worth, I'm writing about this not only to defend my office but also to assure those who would care to believe that despite what the media suggests, justice still means something in this country. And that there are still people who will make sure that it stays that way.